In the first chapter I can totally relate to people seeing two sides of situations. My fiancée is a complete pessimist (he says realist) and I am a hopeless optimist. He will see the negative in every situation…everyone is out to get everyone else. I, however, have this complete naïve trust of people and think people are genuinely good people who occasionally have poor judgment. I think this is one of the reasons we compliment each other so well.
I was intrigued by the idea that we produce reasons for our actions that are plausible in our own minds. When working with children (or even adults for that matter), I frequently ask “why did you do that?” and the answers don’t always make sense to me. I have been told on more than one occasion that I am a person that “has an answer for everything”. My dad tells me it makes me argumentative, but in my mind, I am just trying to express why it seems like a good idea to me. Now I can tell him that it is my own interpretation of what is going on around me.
The universe of measurement is not where I dwell. I have never been competitive, nor do I define success by “getting ahead” or “overcoming the odds”. I do know several people who live in this universe and what always strikes me is that they are NEVER happy. No matter how much they achieve or how much they have, they always want more…always have to be better than the guy next door/down the street/etc.
I was so inspired by the story of the teacher who gave everyone an A and then asked them to write about it. The one thing I hate most about my job is giving grades. In my mind I would rather meet with the parents and tell then the strengths and areas of improvement with their child. Unfortunately we are in a place in our society right now where we need to rank students and therefore rank teachers in order to gauge success. In essence we are saying that performance on an isolated task equates mastery. Even as it’s written you can sense the idiocracy in it…yet it persists.
This book really has me critically thinking about my life both personally and professionally (as the title suggests). I really want to be a contribution in my family and with my students and co-workers. I think that sometimes it is easy to get lost in the negativity and the competitiveness that is out there. It is only by taking this critical look at myself and my every day practices that I will be able to make that conscious effort to be a contributor, give that A, and see the good in the world.
I am totally recommending this book to everyone!
Heather:
ReplyDeleteI think they call manufacturing reasons, rationalizing, but when you call it interpretation, it gives me pause. Your version makes it sound like merely a case of putting things into context. Everyone comes from a different point-of-view, so it makes sense that we would each represent a different context.
I too struggle with perpetually unhappy people, at least I am interpreting them as unhappy. Its easy to say that they are content looking for something to complain about or looking for the negative, but what strikes me is that those people don't seem to be able to will happiness. In most cases, I think "positive" people can simply decide to be upbeat and happy no matter what's going on around them. In my case, it's because I feel like crap feeling like crap (not very poetic, but appropriate) and I decide to change. I will even go so far as to say that it works with minor illness too (or at least it helps you to avoid sick days).
BTW - My wife and I are very similar to you and your husband. We've been married 22 years and we are polar opposites. As long as she remembers who's in charge and has the final say, we'll continue to get along...
I'm so glad that the book has struck a cord with you and hope that over the next few weeks you will see the places in your classroom and life that you need to throw open the doors and step into the realm of possibility.
ReplyDeleteHeather -
ReplyDeleteI agree with what you said about student grades. I think that is why I prefer kindergarten. Our grades, essentially, consist of a yes or no - S or N. However, in meeting with the parents I am able to explain all of the skills required for promotion. I can show what their child is capable of doing in the classroom and how many of the state required skills they have mastered. There are some grey areas, however, for the most part it is usually rather simple. They can either identify the letters or they can not. They can either count objects in a set or they can not. I enjoy being able to sit with my parents and show them work their child has done, not just a number on a page.
Heather –
ReplyDeleteI can relate to you in the difference between you and your fiancee’s view of people and trusting them. I tend to believe that most people are trustworthy simply because I want to give them the benefit of the doubt. And like you, I always “think” I know the answer to everything and WAY too many times has it turned around and bit me. OUCH!!! Is there a place in time where “getting ahead” can be bad? I suppose it all depends on the motive behind your strategy. Does there ever come a time when wanting to get ahead become your demise? A good friend of mine, my age, is very successful at his age. He has several businesses open and operating. He is VERY creative and has already established a growing reputation. I have to admit, I am ALWAYS jealous of his endeavors. It seems like everything he puts his hands to is always profitable for him. No…..I understand that money isn’t everything. However, I would like to see a little more success and profit for my accomplishments. Great thoughts.