Christine wrote:
Practice 9: Lighting a Spark:
This chapter lit a spark for me. If I didn’t
know any better I would have thought it
was written with me in mind. I do not like
the word “no” very much (not that any of us
really do) and work hard not
to hear it often. I don’t tend to ask others
for much or put myself out there, because
when I do and I am told no, it just reaffirms
why I don’t ask for help in the first place. (Clearly, my negative anticipation puts out the spark and keeps me un-enrolled). Not the best of attitudes I realize. So when I read these words, they made me laugh. “Were we to take a “no” less personally and ourselves less seriously we might hear something else” (pg 126). I half expected to see my name somewhere in this statement.
Practice 10: Being the Board
I have always believed things happen for a reason; good, bad or indifferent. I realize I may not always know the reason and some times may never know the reason, but this type of thinking has always served me well. My pet peeve in life are those people who think the world is out to get them and have a “whoa is me” attitude. They believe everything bad happens only to them and therefore they have no control over their life. Being the board is a great way to take control over my life. Although I never recognized myself as “the board” after reading this practice I can definitely appreciate knowing that I am the board. With or without this label, accepting responsibility for my life and all that happens gives me the power to transform my experiences of any unwanted situation into one with which I care to live.
Project 11: Creating Frameworks for Possibility
I have always believed that life is full of possibility. Creating the frameworks for possibility is an area that I am currently working on. My mind is cluttered with both chaos and possibility, with chaos winning lately. I am in a transitional place in my life and am finding it difficult to focus. As I was reading this practice I found myself having to read and re-read it. Of all of the words and examples in this passage this thought made the most sense to me and perhaps explains my current struggle in creating frameworks for possibility. “The person who rigorously maintains the clarity to stand confidently in the abundant universe of possibility creates an environment around him generative of certain kinds of conversations” (pg. 174). Clarity is what I am lacking and therefore limiting my conversations. This is most definitely a practice that will take some time for me to perfect.
Practice 12: Telling the WE Story
I personally like this practice. The connection of WE is a very powerful one. WE can often do things that I or you alone cannot do. I think about my daughter. She is a single mom with a one year old baby boy. On her own she struggles and is fearful, but together WE (she and I and her brothers) ease her fears and provide to her the support she really needs. WE also work together to give her son, my grandson, the security in life that he deserves. I too am a single mom, with 3 kids. Unlike my daughter I did not have a WE story for support. I had an I story. I was and am responsible for my kids. For my kids, WE is the way they were raised. WE are a family. WE are there for each other, and together WE are strong.
My response:
Such great insight you have had! Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is take a look inside ourselves and begin the change from within. I applaud you for applying the "We" story to your family. Often times we fall into the patterns of our past and it is much harder to break these patterns and start afresh. What a wonderful role model you are for your family!